Pat - Testing.
Tyler - Hello and welcome to the Tyler Dellow show with me, Tyler Dellow, Pat McLean
Pat - Hello
Steve - And Terry Sawchuk is dead ....
Steve - Well, I looked at the team and I thought, well, if everything breaks right we might need a veteran goaltender, you know, who could win us the Cup.
Tyler/Pat - HAHAHAHAHAHA
Tyler - You thought the Oilers could win the Cup with that roster.
Steve - well, yeah
Tyler - that shitty roster
Steve - well, you never know, its like that fellow, you heard about him, he was killed by a gorilla
Pat - By a gorilla, where was that?
Steve - on Whyte Avenue
Tyler/Pat - HAHAHAHA
Tyler - You're talking shit! That never happened!
Steve - Oh yeah, last summer. This fella was walking down Whyte Avenue and then a gorilla leapt out from an alley and it tore him to pieces.
Pat - A gorilla! Where did it come from? (snickering)
Steve - Well, he was at at the zoo see. And you know he was tired of it so he escaped.
Tyler - How did he escape?
Steve - Well, he was dressed like a man, see, and so he's ...
Tyler - Wait wait. He's dressed like a man. How the fuck does a gorilla get dressed up?
Steve - Well what he was doing is, people would come by, see, and you know they're hot, so they take off say, a hat, or a jacket, or their pants ...
Tyler/Pat - HAHAHAHA
Steve - right and so they put it down and he reaches out and grabs it
Tyler - So he assembled a wardrobe ....
Steve - Yeah
Pat - So there's some guy, he's at the zoo and he takes off his pants. Why would he take off his pants? And even more interesting, why would he not notice that they were gone?
Steve - Well, he'd be hot you know. So he'd take off his pants, to cool off.
Tyler - Talking Shit!!
Steve - And you know he'd be nice and comfortable and wearing his boxers and you know nobody noticed so he just figures well, I'll walk around like this, see. And then the gorilla grabs his pants. And so after a few weeks he has everything he needs and he's all like 'hey' to the zookeeper, 'hey, I got in here by accident, can you let me out?'
Tyler - What nonsense is this? And he believes it all, yeah?
Pat - Yeah.
Steve - And so the zookeeper is like 'oh well yeah', and he let him out you know and he says 'thanks very much for letting me out, it was unsafe in there with all of those gorillas'
Tyler/Pat - HAHAHAHHA
Tyler - You are so full of shit. So this gorilla steals a wardrobe, escaped from the zoo and then killed a man on Whyte Avenue? None of this ever happened. None of this ever happened.
Pat - Never mind that is all a figment of imagination but what does this have to do with signing Khabibulin?
Steve - well, see, your man who's walking down Whyte Avenue, you know, he gets up that morning, you know, maybe he's a little hungover, so he's on his way, to get a burger maybe or maybe he's going to Boston Pizza, well anyhow he leaves his house and if you said to him, 'well now you're going to get killed by a gorilla' well, he would say 'that's not going to happen, its a load of bullocks' but of course it did happen. So you know, its why I signed Khabibulin, you know, it was best to hedge my bets just in case we actually contended, well it would have been bad if we didn't have a Cup winning goalie, right?
Pat - so you signed Khabibulin because basically anything can happen, like you might get killed by a gorilla walking down Whyte Avenue. Which is something that never actually happened.
Steve - It did.
Tyler - That explains a lot. Steve Tambellini logic. Is there any intelligent life behind those dopey eyes you wanker? I guess we know the answer to that question would be no.
Stay tuned for the next episode when we discuss another Oilers' management disaster, Sheldon Souray, who Daryl Katz has paid an NHL salary, along with Jeff Drouin Deslauriers and Zack Stortini, to play in the minors. Souray is on waivers and, if claimed, will get paid only half of his remaining salary by Katz.
Its nice to be rich.